Hello expectant Mom! 

We’re Melissa and Chris!

A California native and a British import hoping to expand their little family through the gift of adoption. We met in 2007, married in 2009, bought a house in 2015, and became foster parents in 2018 through which we had the privilege of raising two little ones. After the crazy year that was 2020 we hope to start our family in 21! Our friends and family describe us  as a loving, outgoing, and intelligent couple. Our cats would probably review us as “8 out of 10 -- could give more snacks.” However we’d describe ourselves as just Melissa and Chris, two kids at heart looking forward to fun family trips to zoos, theme parks, and abroad!

Making the decision to place your child into the care of others must be overwhelming -- but we believe that it can be the beginning of an exciting new relationship, filled with new possibilities and bright futures.

Our Story

Originally we met online in 2007 (on MySpace…yes, that was still a thing back then!) while Melissa was living in England. After exchanging emails for a while, we decided to meet face to face -- best decision ever! Our friendship quickly blossomed into something more.

We discovered we both enjoyed traveling  and together saw various sights of the UK -- visiting castles being among our favorite. When Melissa returned to California we soon began making plans on how we would live in the same country...

After a long-distance relationship for two years Chris officially became a British import of sunny Southern California. We married shortly after and have been together for over twelve years now. We have lived in several areas of Los Angeles County, but a few years ago  finally decided to buy a house in a small, diverse suburban community where we enjoy hearing the birds singing in the mornings. 

While we love our fur babies dearly (two tabby cats, Julius and Yoda, whom we adopted from a shelter), we have always wanted to fill our house with the pitter-patter of little footsteps. When we discovered biological children wouldn’t be an option for us adoption felt like a natural fit. Both of our  families have experience with adoption -- as both adoptive parents and adoptees -- and they encouraged us to consider the options. At first, we opened our home to foster children in need of loving care while their birth families healed, and over the past couple of years we’ve been fortunate to have two little ones come through our home. While saying goodbye to each of them was hard, we feel our lives have been enriched by their time with us. The experience opened our eyes to the need for loving homes for these precious little souls, the importance of biological family connections, and the need to help birth families heal. It has also taught us what being a parent means, and has strengthened our desire to welcome a permanent addition to our family. We feel ready for the next chapter in our story, and hope to take those exciting first steps with you!

Us as Parents

Fostering two infants has taught us many things -- patience, perseverance, and that diaper explosions are real! Most important though it taught us the kind of parents we will be.

We both believe strongly in a ‘child centered’ environment. Our two foster loves quickly became the center of our world as we adapted our home -- and our lives -- around their needs. Providing structure and security through routines we feel is key, for example singing songs and reading books at bedtime (and of course doing all the character voices for the stories is a must!).

A focus on education is also important to us, and we feel that starting from an early age all the way through college gives a child the tools they need to succeed in life. Without a doubt education is almost as important as…

Play! We also feel very strongly that a child needs to be free to be a child, to indulge their imagination and curiosity, to pretend and play dress-up! With both of our foster kiddos we’ve loved getting down to their level and engaging in creative play, and have found it by far the best way to bond. Love and laughter are truly restorative!

But... All children have tantrums. And how you deal with the hard times is just as important as the good. Our thoughts on discipline are to let a child know it’s okay to be mad, it’s okay to get frustrated, and to help them develop the tools to handle these emotions in a constructive way. We found with our foster kids that ‘time-in’ was always more effective than time-out -- sitting with the child away from the situation and giving them the space to express their feelings. More often than not, after some wailing and arm throwing, they would come running to us arms wide ready to have their teary eyes wiped and get back to the busy work of being a kid.

Our Home

We live in a single family home with a spacious backyard in a small suburban city in Southern California. The recent pandemic has made us realize the importance of our outdoor space, and we recently re-landscaped the backyard to include a large lawn, children’s play area, sandpit, and an outdoor play house.  

One of the wonderful things about Southern California is its diverse landscape. We’re fortunate enough to live 30 minutes from the mountains and 30 minutes from the beach (unless it’s rush hour -- then with LA traffic all bets are off!), and we enjoy taking day trips on the weekends to explore new places.

We also have the most wonderful neighbors who’ve doted on our foster children almost as much as we have -- showering them with Christmas and Birthday gifts, and playing games with them in the yard.

About Chris, by Melissa

As a couple, Chris and I are two halves of a whole: he is the more outgoing one who can have a conversation with anyone, the “do-er,” and in charge of technology around the house. During the weekdays, he works in IT at a local university.  

The youngest of 4, Chris grew up on the outskirts of a large seaside city in southern England (yes, he has the accent!), and his three older siblings significantly influenced who he is today. Chris is actively in touch with his inner child--he loves building lego sets, watching cartoons from his childhood, and dressing up for Halloween (he has been a Ghostbuster for the past 11 years, complete with a proton pack he built from scratch). Unabashedly, Chris is a Trekkie and has watched episodes of Star Trek so many times that he can recite the lines.   

When thinking about Chris’ and my personalities, I tend to say: “He gives me roots, and I give him wings.” We have both  experienced ups and downs in our life together, including Chris losing his mom to cancer, but through it all, he has been my rock. He is also a supportive and loving husband, and has been an amazing father to our foster children. Chris is a devoted dad who made a Ghostbusters car for our foster daughter for Halloween, played princess dress-up, and learned to make ponytails.  Chris is my best friend and I couldn’t think of a better partner in life and building our family.

About Melissa, by Chris

You know how people will say how there is that ‘one’ perfect match for everyone? Well at the risk or being cliché, Melissa is  my soulmate. Despite being generally magnificent -- she excels at everything she does, and is a consistent inspiration – she is humble, genuine, and caring. Like most people, when we began fostering we had yet to know what kind of parents we would be. But Melissa was immediately a natural mom and helped me find my footing and confidence as a dad.

Melissa grew up in a small rural town in Northern California. She  is the youngest of three and was raised by a single mother who sacrificed much so that she would have the opportunity to go to college and to travel. Melissa speaks fluent Spanish, and even lived in Spain for a year during her college education, but it was whilst Melissa was traveling in England that we met. After a few short months of dating, I knew I would cross oceans for her. In the end, I quite literally did!

Fiercely passionate about history, Melissa has a particular interest in historical architecture. She’s made a career from preserving historic buildings in Los Angeles, working to designate and protect culturally significant landmarks.  

Melissa applies that same protective dedication towards her family and friends. As we look to start our family I can’t think of anyone I’d rather take this journey with.

Our Family & Friends

Although our family lives out of town, technology allows us to remain close between visits. We try to take road trips to Northern California a couple of times a year to see Melissa’s family on the ranch, and enjoy spending a lot of time with friends in that area whenever possible.

Chris’ family living in England gives us regular opportunities to travel across the pond as well, and to visit London and other major UK destinations. While the Queen sadly has still to invite us to Buckingham  Palace, we remain optimistic....(kidding -- the invite went to our brother-in-law instead!)

Our families also have had a lot of experience with adoption. Our sister-in-law, Crissy, was herself an adoptee and has been sharing with us her unique perspective on what that has been like growing up, and then getting to know her biological family in later years. Chris’ brother and wife, Mark and Fiona, also chose the path of adoption to grow their family, adopting two beautiful little girls who are growing into strong, intelligent women.

Rosie and Sergio -- our closest friends -- have been constant companions in our recent adventures with foster care, and have provided us with emotional support as we came to terms with infertility and chose the path of adoption. They have helped guide us through the highs and the lows, and remain keen to be a significant part of our future children’s lives.

Thank You

For taking time to read about us and our story. We hope this brief introduction has helped you get an idea of who we are,  what our family is like, and how your child would grow and develop within our home. Trying to paint the full picture of a couple through the canvas of a few pages is difficult, but we hope this glimpse into our lives will be the start of something very special, and we’d love to connect with you so we can get to know each other better. Certainly, we would love to hear your story.

No matter the decisions you make, we want you to know that you are brave and you are loved.